Idiot Nation

I heard this morning that a group of kids were arrested for vandalism the other day. Now that might not really be anything worth talking about, but if you dig deeper, there is a story behind the story. The kids got busted because, not only did they video tape their illegal antics, they posted it on youtube.

What the hell is wrong with kids these days? It seems like daily there is some teenage numbskull on the television who was busted for doing something totally ridiculous. I know most of you remember the video post of the girls who beat the hell out of that other girl for supposedly taunting them in cyberspace (white on white crime-but no one really likes to talk about that, do they?). There was the incident; the youtube post; ridiculous press coverage; and then arrests. It doesn't require a degree to figure out. In case there are teenagers reading this (which I doubt because teens don't read), you know the tape that you have in your possession? Yeah, that thing you just took out of the video camera-that's called evidence and it can and will be used against you in a court of law. Oh, and incidentally, the guy sitting behind the table placard that reads Plaintiff, and the the guy/girl sitting on the perch wearing the black robe and holding the wooden hammer, they aren't your friends, teachers, parents, or any other person that you've successfully manipulated in the past. They are THE LAW and they've seen enough idiots, just like you, who thought that they could play dumb, or concoct some oddly ridiculous story that flies with mother but couldn't fool a 5th grader. If you lined up the people who came in to court with the dog ate my homework excuse, you could wrap it around the globe 29 times.

Honestly, I don't blame the kids-I blame the parents and the teachers. A child's first bout with authority is usually with their parents, and then later with the administrative staff at school. If either of these institutions show too much leniency, complacency, or are exposed for their naivete, you can rest assured that the child will one day interface with the judicial system and think that it's as porous as their earlier bouts with authority systems. Sadly, parents and the school system are failing children. Parents these days want to be buddies with their children. By doing so, they neglect the duties and responsibilities required to raise a productive member of society. When a child can spin a tall tale and the parent(s) fail to become Ellory Queen and investigate every nuance of the story, that child has just learned that he or she can manipulate the truth and you (the parent) will be danced around the truth for the rest of the time that child is in your care. Parents have to make it difficult for the child to lie, and even more difficult for the child to get away with lying.

Once, when I was about 12, a stepfather of mine called me in for dinner. I had been playing outside all day and I went to the restroom and then sat down to eat. My stepfather asked if I had washed my hands. My response was yes. He then asked if I'd used soap. I again replied yes. He then got up, walked into the bathroom, and brought out a completely dry bar of soap and asked me why the soap was still dry if I'd just used it. Two things occurred at that very moment-#1 I realized this man was no idiot, and #2 next time I better wet the soap (kidding). Actually, what I did learn was that lies were fallible. And if you told one, it had better have been after some serious planning. If you come of the top of the head with it, someone with half a brain will be able to pick it apart. I became so impressed with his technique, I began to explore ways of lying and how those lies were easily exposed. I tried desperately to come up with a foolproof caper, and my 12 year old mind was unable to create a scenario whereby I couldn't get busted. So what did I finally decide to do? Give up lying until I could get better at it. After years of practicing honesty, I never really looked back. That's not to say that I haven't lied-but I have been honest to the point where I've lost girlfriends, and jobs-I feel compelled to tell the truth.

It doesn't help that our government has adopted a prove it mentality. When kids hear the president of the United States say things like, "I didn't inhale," or I didn't have sex with that woman, Monica Lewinsky," and both of those statements be bold-faced lies, where is their incentive to tell the truth? The rotting fish is lying from the tail to the head, why should the children be any different?

You might be thinking that it wasn't lying that got the bumbling youtube criminals busted-but it was lying. Lying and not being busted, (or not being punished if they did get busted). It bred this overconfidence in their ability to get out of trouble. They tell themselves these ridiculously childish stories that have more holes in them than swiss cheese-a pre prepared excuse that with even a cursory glance would appear to be as thin as tissue paper. But hey, come on, mom falls for it all the time. Well there's one thing mom lacks, and that's the experience of sitting all day and hearing the same tired stories from criminals who confuse judges with their blinder-wearing mothers. The judge has heard it all. In fact, I'll bet you money that he can probably take one look at a defendant and, based upon their appearance and the crime they are being charged with, predict the story that will come bellowing from their mouth. This is precisely why they insist you not represent yourself-you're an idiot and we need to appoint someone to keep you from tripping over your own two feet.

Committing a crime and then posting the evidence on youtube is intellectually equivalent to walking into roll call at the local police station and robbing at gun point all whom are in attendance...without a disguise. And if this isn't remotely apparent to the idiot who decides to post what he or she sees as his or her ticket to fame, then we've managed to create an entire nation of idiots who will undoubtedly continue to exhibit this incredibly imbecilic type of behavior no matter how many are caught. My hope is that this doesn't become epidemic because, instead of hitting the streets and doing real investigative work, our detectives will spend their valuable time perusing the posts of youtube looking for their next big case.


Wake up people.


TPOKW