For Whom The Bell Tolls

I'm in a quandary over so many things these days, but one thing's for certain-my marriage is pretty much done. It sort of feels like when that terminally ill relative who has been hanging on for years finally passes; for obvious reasons you can't bring yourself to feel sad-yet you feel that you should. Last night my (soon to be ex) wife and I got into a bitter, brutal battle. She's once again gone through my personal belongings and discovered I had lunch with another woman. After I've told her on many occasions that I've declared myself free to date whomever I choose. She still insists on this type of behavior.

The mere fact that she discovered this information the very same day it occurred leads to only one conclusion-she's been snooping through my phone on a daily basis-looking for something. I've on several occasions found the complete contents of my cell phone copied either in her phone or on some tablet in her possession. The reasoning behind this I don't know but I know it can't be good. She'd done this once before to get names of people she invited to a surprise birthday party at Acapulco's restaurant. Nothing I do discourages this type of behavior. I know she's been doing it for a while, even after I told her that who I decide to fuck is my business.

I refuse to lock my phone, I don't believe I should have to. Not to mention the fact that I don't have anything to hide. But I know the moment she decides to call and can't get a hold of me, she's going to call the girl I had lunch with. This existence is so pathetic-and so is she. She's done everything in her power to ruin our marriage-infidelity, lying, complete and utter financial irresponsibility. I had no idea human beings could be so awful and still be allowed to be a part of our society. If this was a Native-American society, she would be banished from the tribe for her behavior. But then again, she wouldn't be as awful a person because she would have been treated in a kind way as a child.

I'm not quite sure how this chapter will end but one thing is for certain, it will end.